Romans 8:28 may not apply to YOU...

One of the best-loved verses in the entire Bible is Paul's proclamation to the Romans at the end of the first half of his epistle to the believers in that great city. What we call chapters one through eight of the Book of Romans is a lengthy argument for Christ's overcoming of the Mosaic Law - that is, the fact that by coming to earth, leading a sinless life and then accepting our deserved punishment for the many sins each of us commit in our lives, Jesus of Nazareth [the Christ, the Messiah] replaced much of what the Jews of the day followed from the time of Moses forward, meaning the laws specified in the first five books of the Bible (the "Torah", as it were). 

When we accept Christ's sacrifice as payment for our sins, and allow Him and the Trinity (God the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit) to become the Lords of our life, says Paul, we are essentially dying with Christ on the cross (he says this more explicitly in the book of Ephesians, by the way). And once we have died as men and women, we are reborn as children of God. Well, the Law only applies to those who live, goes his reasoning, so we are no longer subject to the Law. 

By the way, this would become a huge issue for Paul as he dealt with the Jerusalem-based Christians, led after a few years by Jesus' half-brother James (who has his own book in the New Testament, by the way). James and Peter and many of the "original" apostles wanted to make Christianity an offshoot of Judaism - and in fact, the Romans saw the Believers as a "Nazarene Jewish sect", generally - while Paul and his followers understood Jesus' desire to bring Him to all the world, Jews and Gentiles alike, without the restraints of the Jewish rites and restrictions handed down on stone tablets. It's what led to Paul's assault upon his arrival in Rome near 60 AD, whereupon he appealed to the Emperor (as a Roman citizen by birth, he had that right), and was eventually shipped to Rome (read the last few chapters of the book of Acts for all of this sometime - it's as harrowing a tale as anything Homer ever wrote!), where he would preach the Gospel for a few years before being killed by Nero for being a Christian *which is all the crime you needed in those days.

Back to the topic of this post.

In the concluding chapter of this argument, chapter 8, Paul tells us that God is always with us, because the Holy Spirit dwells within us, speaking to God for us in groans and whispers when we're not even sure what words to use. Eventually he'll conclude in Romans 8:38-39 with the grand statement that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Before that, however, an even more hopeful statement is expressed in verse 28 - the thought that no matter how terrible something seems to be, it's in God's Hands and so it's going to be all right:

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.

The essence of the sentence reads, All things work together for good. That sounds wonderful! ALL things that happen, God makes into part of His Tapestry of Life, a tapestry which from verses like Jeremiah 29:11 we know are plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Even if you accept that we may not see some of those positive things until we arrive in Heaven, that's still a wonderful promise! 

But what does the rest of the verse mean? Well, we know that "for those who love God" means "Christians", and "for those who are called according to His purpose" are God's Elect - also, essentially, "Christians". 

So, Romans 8:28 whittles down to, We know that all things work together for good for Christians.

Great. Soooooo... um, what about everybody else? What does God say about you, non-believer?

NOTHING.

There's nothing in this epistle that says that anything "works together for good" for you, or "works together" at all, for that matter. In fact, it's a safe venture to say that to whatever extent things "work together" for a non-believer, it's because Satan or his little buddies are knitting their own little Handkerchiefs of Death, and are stitching in a starring role for you. Yay?

In fact, in the very next verses following his dramatic declaration in 8:38-39, Paul expresses how different the outcome is for Christians and for those who fail to accept Christ as their personal savior - this is Romans 9:1-3 (I'm using the NLT for a change, because it's the clearest on this point):


With Christ as my witness, I speak with utter truthfulness. My conscience and the Holy Spirit confirm it. My heart is filled with bitter sorrow and unending grief for my people, my Jewish brothers and sisters. I would be willing to be forever cursed—cut off from Christ!—if that would save them.



Think for a minute about what Paul is truly saying here. 

He understands how incredible what he's saying sounds, because despite the fact that no one ever doubted Paul's truthfulness, he feels the need to spell out the veracity of what he's about to say: "With Christ as my witness, I speak with utter truthfulness" should be more than enough, but he continues with "My conscience and the Holy Spirit confirm it", thereby invoking two-thirds of the Trinity in his declaration. Does he have your attention yet?

He goes on to explain, after eight chapters of detail as to why the Jewish Law is a failed method to reach God, to express his "bitter sorrow and unending grief". For whom? For "MY people". Remember, Paul is - or, was - a Jew among Jews, as it were. Listen to him describe his credentials to the Philippians in Phil 3:4-8 →

 If anyone else thinks he has reason for confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; as to the law, a Pharisee; as to zeal, a persecutor of the church; as to righteousness under the law, blameless. But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.

So, it's his tribal family he is defending and grieving over - but more than being a Hebrew, Paul is first and foremost a servant of Christ. So, look what he offers to save "his people", knowing full well what it is he's giving up: "I would be willing to be forever cursed—cut off from Christ!—if that would save them."

Not just "cut off from Christ" but an eternity in Hell itself! THIS is how strongly he feels about saving the people he loves! Paul understands the catastrophic consequences of the decision he's making - because he's willing to trade one life (his own) for thousands of lives of his Jewish brethren.



So, let's sum up what we've learned in Romans today:

What happens to the Believers? Let's see: for US, everything in this life, good OR bad, works together to improve our existence here... and then when we die, we get to go to Heaven!

And...what happens to the non-Believers? Well, whatever happens on earth during our lifetime is happenstance (at best), and then we die and spend eternity separated from God in Hell. 

          It just doesn't seem like that tough of a choice, y'know?

Between Angels And Demons

I feel like I’m in a battle between God and the devil.

Yesterday, I mentioned that the Lord saved me yesterday through music. Today, the demons are after me again. (I’m going to say “the devil” or “the adversary”, although in truth I understand I’m not nearly important enough for Satan himself to mess with. I hope you’ll understand.) That voice is deep inside my head right now, knowing how weak I am.

You see, on Tuesday I tried sleeping at my fiancée’s house in a recliner she has got this very purpose. I’ve slept in it before... but now, my condition has worsened to the point where sleep is increasingly uncomfortable. In an unfamiliar setting, I couldn’t sleep until four.

So I was in bad shape Wednesday. I worked half a day and that’s all I could handle. I came home and tried to sleep. It didn’t work well, but in my own chair I got a little rest... and only four hours the next night. So Thursday, I had no shot. I fell down (into my chair, thankfully) during the pledge, looked at my teaching partner, and emailed my boss that I needed to go home.

And yet...
And yet.

I took extra sleep medicine last night, went to bed early (by ten) after napping a little during the day. I slept solidly for four hours, and couldn’t go back to sleep. Shoot.

So, I’m a mess. And the adversary knows that. The voice is back in my skull, reminding me that my disease will only continue to get worse, that the pain and fatigue would just get worse and worse. The voice assured me that Heaven awaits, that in a moment I could be rid of the disease and the pain would be gone forever.

Today, God’s weapons were His preachers.

If I have time in the morning, I always listen to my two favorite radio preachers: Greg Laurie and Richard Ellis. And today, Laurie’s sermon was rather relevant: what is temptation and where does it come from...and how do you defend yourself against it?

Ellis’ sermon was more blunt: how we can throw a monkey wrench into God’s plans, sabotaging His arrangements through our choices...including and especially through suicide. Ellis made a terribly convincing argument how only God should decide when we leave here. He talked of his mother’s death, one like my mom’s where there is a moment when “you shift from praying for her survival to praying for God to send the bus and take her Home.” But he also said that his mother “crossed the finish line like a champion, and teaching him right through to the end.”

God couldn’t have been more blunt with me if He’d had them say my name when speaking.

All day, I can feel the devil messing with me - papers flying in the wind, emphasizing my weaknesses, and so forth - and the Lord recovering my sanity for me with every attack against “us”. Because it IS a battle in which I have a Partner, One much stronger than any the adversary could ever throw at me. As Paul said in his letter to the Romans (8:31),

31”What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can beⁱ against us?“

The life-saving power of concert band music.

My life was saved today by John Zdeclik.

I’ll explain.

I had a rough night last night. Stayed at my fiancee’s house last night - it was too tired and it was too difficult for me to drive the ten miles home. She has an old recliner in her room for this very situation, knowing I can’t sleep meaningfully on a bed any more. Well, it’s turning out I can’t sleep meaningfully in that old recliner any more, either. Battled it all night - different configurations of pillows, prayers, you name it. Finally got a couple hours at 4 am; alarm went off at six. Up and at ‘em, boy!

So I taught for the morning session, and surprisingly, rather decently. I begged off on the afternoon with my teaching partner. (We only have a handful in there right now, having sent a literal ton to the high school after the New Year.) Intended to go home, climb in my zero-zero-zero chair, and try to make up some of the missing sleep.

I didn’t. Don’t know why.

Instead, I drove (with difficulty) back to Twin Falls and had lunch. Pizza buffet. The perfect meal. While I was driving, I turned on my concert band channel and listened to a couple of my all-time favorite songs to play or conduct or listen to.

“Russian Christmas Music”, by Alfred Reed.
“Variations On A Korean Folk Song”, John Barnes Chance.
“Liturgical Dance”, by the modern genius David Holsinger.
“On A Hymnsong Of Philip Bliss”, also by Holsinger.

And while I was there in Twin, driving towards the majestic bridge that spans the Snake River Canyon, my life was at peace. It was time to end it. The pain and fatigue and dizziness and everything that went with it could all just go away. I would be with Christ momentarily. I had two goodbye letters ready in the car - one for the general public, and a more intimate one for my children on particular. Enough was enough. “I have fought the good fight, and my life was ready to be poured out as a drink offering,” as the apostle Paul would have said. And I’ve always wanted to feel what it was like to go flying off that bridge like a base jumper, sans all that equipment that keeps them alive when they hit the ground. One wonderful five second flight, and then Heaven.

But on my sound system in the car, John Zdeclik’s magical piece, “Chorale And Shaker Dance” came on. It’s a piece based on the “Simple Gifts” melody that most people know well. I’ve played it in high school, conducted multiple arrangements of it with various bands of my own, and even created a marching version of it to base a show around (called “simplicity”, oddly enough).

I know that amazing music by heart. Every note and nuance, from the third clarinet fingerings in the sixteenth note figures in the three measures at rehearsal letter S to where the cues point in the subtle entrances in the mysterious transition before the da capo in measure 124. Every glorious note.

God sent me that music to give me a reason to live.

I couldn’t die with that incredible music in my soul. And especially not while it was playing. So I kept driving.

👂

I’m home now. I’ve slept a couple of hours. I still hurt, I still feel the pain and terrible TAM sensations that bring me to the brink so often (blissfully, not as close as today very often). And I know a day will come when the pain and fatigue and misery from this disease will overcome my will to live, and not even God will be able to stop me without supernatural means.

Or maybe, just maybe...

The power of music is already supernatural means. Especially for an old music teacher.

Seeing is not necessarily believing

Am currently reading Exodus in my annual trek through the Bible, and am at the yearly point where I’m simply aghast at how whiny and insipid the Hebrew nation is (the one circa 3500 years ago, I mean: the one Moses and Aaron rescue with 101% help from Yahweh).

It also drives home how difficult it is to convince a non-believer in the saving power of Jesus Christ.

Consider what these people saw:
} Ten plagues, all visible to everybody: frogs, water becoming blood, pitch darkness and so forth.
} The worst of the plagues, the death of every first born, was so amazing and memorable that even today it’s commemorated in the Passover celebration.
} The parting of the Red Sea, and its subsequent collapsing upon the Egyptian armies following them.  (They even sang songs about that one!)
} The oases which God created for them... or transformed for them, like the one they named “Marah” because of its bitterness at first (until He sweetened the water).
} The manna from Heaven which appeared like magic six days per week (and spoiled on cue when it was time for a new batch to fall).
} And the quail which flew in on cue when their whining for meat grew loud enough.
} Even their miraculous victories in battle, like the one in chapter 18 against the Amalekites, won when Moses held his staff aloft (and ONLY then - they had to help him after he started to get tired!).

And YET...

Whenever they felt the slightest discomfort - when the million-plus travelers didn’t enjoy at least Motel Six conditions in the middle of the desert - they whined and cried about how Moses (not God, mind you!) had brought them to the wilderness to die. If that weren’t bad enough, the first time Moses left them for more than a few days - doing their work, in fact; climbing Mount Dinai to take dictation from God for the rules to live by - they decided they needed a God they could SEE.

Enter the Golden Calf.

In Exodus 32, they decide Moses isn’t coming back so they convince Aaron to boil down the gold they voluntarily give him (gold they only had, mind you, because God had arranged their departure in such a way that their Egyptian neighbors GAVE them their gold to get out of town!) and make an idol. An idol, of course, God had JUST TOLD THEM NOT TO WORSHIP.

So, if these people who literally lived with the God of the Universe traveling alongside them for more than a year, didn’t believe in Him.... why is it so hard to comprehend that you and I might have friends we know and love who also refuse to see God for what He Is? If the nation of Israel can be so blind to the evidence of the love and grace and goodness and power of the Lord Almighty, so can any person living in 2018 in a sin-riddled culture on a planet ruled by the “prince of the air”.

If a non-believer is ready to come to Christ, he’ll come. If he or she isn’t, then that’s not such a shock that you should feel insulted or upset. If and when they’re ready, they’ll be saved. Just keep trying. You might or might not be the person who brings them that final step to salvation - and perhaps they won’t make it to salvation before He Comes again, tragically - but you’re doing what He instructed us to do. Share the Gospel with all the world.

Starting from where you live.

Welcome to 2018, possibly our last year on earth, Christians!

I could be completely wrong about the timing of this, of course, but my belief that the Rapture will take place in 3018 is well documented. 

But the Lord told us to keep living our lives until it actually happens. “For as were the days of Noah, so will be the Coming of the Son of Man. For as in those days before the flood, they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day when Noah entered the ark, and they were unaware until the flood came and swept them all away; so will be the Coming of the Son of Man.” (Matthew 24:37-39) Of course, I intend to do my part: I always eat and drink more than I should, and I’m now engaged to be married sometime this summer. 

The key, as the following few paragraphs explain, is to remain FAITHFUL to Christ in both word and deed, not wavering in doubt with His supposed “delay” - the Lord is never early or late; He is always just on time - or losing touch with the Holy Spirit (Mt 24:46-51 and Mt 25:1-13, respectively). And the best way to remain close to God throughout is by reading His Word every single day. 

That’s why I highly recommend “Bible-in-a-Year” for every Believer every single year, no matter how long you’ve been His Child. Every year, no matter how well you think you know the Bible, He always has something new for you - and I increase the odds by consuming Scripture differently each year. I’ve read the Bible in the KJV, the HCSB, and the ESV; this year, I read along with the Max McLean audio Bible. I haven’t started yet today, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to try reading the New Living Translation. It’s the most popular of the ‘modern vernacular’ Bibles, used by the majority of pastors who choose 21st century language to share God’s Word with their parishioners.

My goal is simply to find new depth in my reading of the Bible, and thus new information from God’s writing. If I could read Greek or Hebrew, I’d choose those in a heartbeat. But even if I was to read exactly the same copy of the Bible every year, I’d do it. Think: 1189 chapters! You won’t memorize it in one reading per year. There are sections I know extremely well. (I don’t have very many exact memorizations in my skull, partly because I DO use different versions of the Bible.) Just make sure you READ!

And you don’t have to read left to right, although so far I have every year. Most reading plans alternate between Old and New Testaments, or perhaps help you follow chronologically. Heck, go alphabetically if you want! JUST READ IT! You will be amazed at what you discover. 

What will you learn? Here’s what I think are the most important points that doing this drives home:

1) So many take verses out of context. You cannot do that this way. And you’ll learn WHY in many cases. 

2) You will notice how the same thoughts, the same themes recur repeatedly. The more He points something out, the bigger a deal it is. 

3) After a few readings, you might finally discover the truth about the Bible: every single book, chapter, verse, word, is about Jesus Christ, the Son of God. 

Good luck, my friends. Be prepared. He is Coming Soon. 

New Year's Eve, 2017

This is post number 253 of this calendar year, and the 362nd of the (most recent) lifespan of the Act II Ministries blog. Over the course of December, there haven't been many new posts, as we were busy not just with Christmas but with the process of producing and starting to market the collection, "Selected Essays: Act II Ministries 2016-17", now in spiral bound book form and available from this website for a donation of $12 or more. Contact us through the comments for more information, or send your donation to the address on the blogsite with your own contact information so we can ship a copy to you ASAP. [Officially, it's my eleventh book published, with its companion "Selected Stories: Act II Ministries 2016-17", a collection of more personal tales printed in this blog, being the twelfth. I'm thinking of printing up a calendar with all twelve covers commemorated for my own use, as a manifestation of my still-extant sinful pride.] By the way, $12 covers the cost of production and mailing fairly precisely. We've no intention on profiting on this unless God says otherwise.

The other item that's kept me busy during the past week in particular is having proposed to the lovely and talented Dana, about whom I have spoken often and lovingly. It is to her infinite credit that I've learned to love to this extent again, after the death of my "soul mate" and partner in this ministry venture, Melissa Smith, three years ago this month. Dana, you are my last love, and the woman I want to be with when we are taken up by Christ when He splits the eastern sky.

Which brings me to the topic of this final post of 2017.

What would you do during 2018 if you knew it was going to be your last year on earth?

I'm very serious about this question, for many reasons. Those reasons don't matter right now. What would you DO? If I could guarantee that you had no more than twelve months - that you wouldn't be here to celebrate New Year's Rockin' Eve 2019 with Ryan Seacrest and the corpse of Dick Clark - would you live your remaining life differently?

The pat answer, of course, is that we are to live every day as if we could die tomorrow, but that's impractical beyond belief. The closest actual advice I've ever heard on this topic that was functionally useful was to plan like you'll live forever, and live like there's no tomorrow.

But generally, we don't do even that. 

This is not your standard "Carpe Diem!" post. This is a serious admonition that the End is Almost Here. If you've followed my writing over the last fifteen months, or really just the last few months (and God bless you if you have, as erratic a poster as I've been given my failing health!), then you know where I'm coming from.  

All the signs are in place for the "Rapture of Christ's Church" in the imminent future. There are no longer any more "signs" necessary, nothing else needed before the Son of Man appears without warning and snatches up the smaller-than-commonly-expected number of Believers from the surface of this world and takes us Home. 

We use the word "snatches" because Jesus Himself told us it would be sudden. Here is part of the Olivet Discourse, Matthew 24 (verses 15-19) →

15“So when you see the abomination of desolation spoken of by the prophet Daniel, standing in the holy place (let the reader understand), 16then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains. 17Let the one who is on the housetop not go down to take what is in his house, 18and let the one who is in the field not turn back to take his cloak. 19And alas for women who are pregnant and for those who are nursing infants in those days!

Several things to note here. 

"The abomination that causes desolation" is the final step in the countdown to the rapture, the only one left. What that may be is unclear. Many have speculated it to be something about the not-yet reconstructed Third Temple, but at this point that seems a wistful dream at best. More likely, it's some desecration of an already-extant holy site; in my mind, the Western Wall is the obvious candidate. Regardless, when it happens, it's too late to be saved and catch the first train out of town! Verses 16-19 make it clear there won't be a delay after that for us to "catch our breath" or "pack our bags". (What would you possibly want to pack to go to Heaven?)

"Let the reader understand" - is not added later, but is part of the original quotation. Jesus is expecting His Words to be written down and passed on to future generations. That seems an amazingly profound thought for Jesus to have at the moment.

"Alas for women who are pregnant and for those who are nursing infants" - Here's a thought some of you may not have come across. Jesus says on many occasions that to enter into Heaven, we must be like them: staying in Matthew, here's 19:14 →

14but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” 


For to such belongs the Kingdom of Heaven! So not only will the children GO to Heaven, they'll OWN it! So, undoubtedly, the children below a certain age (presumably the age where that child can make a consenting choice) will be taken up unconditionally. Alas for pregnant women and those nursing infants indeed! If they're not saved, their child will be snatched up without them! (I'm assuming that you realize: no matter what our governments may say, to God those babies within their mothers' wombs are already living human beings worthy of salvation. Psalm 139:13 → 

 For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.

As the memesters would say, "Your argument is invalid"!) 

I've written about the impending Rapture before. God has pressed me to talk about it non-stop for the next however-many months we have left. So, that's the primary reason I have for stressing this immediacy issue.

But personally, I have a second one: my health is steadily deteriorating to a frightening level.

Since six months ago, I've lost a great deal of stamina and develop pain much faster. It takes more medication to beat that pain back, and I've had to add three medicines to my daily regimen. While I've been able to stay on the job officially, long-time readers know it's only through the tireless efforts of my teaching assistant Wendy that I'm able to survive day to day (and even so, I can't generally make it through more than three days in a week). Unfortunately, I've recebtly learned that in order to retire on disability from our state's school system and earn disability retirement payments, I have to be off the payroll for five months before even the first test of my ability or inability will be made.

Screw that. God's coming sooner than that! I'm currently planning to just keep teaching until He Returns or until I drop! This is another "Holy Spirit" thing, understand: it's going to be a race to see if I live long enough to see the Rapture, or if the pain gets to me first.

So, for me, it becomes very simple. 2018 will be my last year on the planet, and frankly I can't wait to get to Heaven! 

BUT.... what am I supposed to do with the time left to me here?!?

God didn't leave me here "accidentally", any more than He left YOU here "accidentally". What are we supposed to do to help encourage the lost to come to Christ in these last few months? For me, this blog is an important venue, and I'm pledging to try and post something every day until the End. (I don't make "New Year's Resolutions" generally, because having spent my entire life in the school system, I don't think of January as the "new year"! I've always made those resolutions in August. This year, however, warrants an adjustment.)

I also need to focus this blog in more on the essentials: the salvation of the lost (both the ones reading the blog and the ones you may have in your lives and want to help save) and the urgency of the issue.  The rest of my duties, like always, start from listening to God in prayer and interpreting what He wants me to do. That's not always easy for me to do. Like most pray-ers, I tend to bring my own desires into the prayer circle, when I need to listen more carefully. 

What about you? What do you find God is leading you towards in 2018? Don't waste a DAY of the time you have left, because there aren't very many!    

Caterpillars - a short story

   “I’m telling you, Marty, it’s just plain stupid!”

   “What is, Thom?”

   Thom squinched his forty legs over towards his best friend, the better to be heard without raising his voice.

   “This whole pupa thing of Mother Jayce’s. It makes no sense!”

   Now Marty was fully engaged. Questioning anything Mama Jayce said was tantamount to heresy among the caterpillars. Even when it sounded as bizarre as what she had told the youngsters this morning before they went off to a full day of leaf-eating.

   “You mean how important it was to eat our fill, even past our comfort level, because…”

   “Because in two weeks we would be surrendering our lives as caterpillars and becoming pupae. Pupas? Puppies? Whatever. I’m not doing it!”

   “Yeah, whatever, Thom.”

   “I’m serious, Marty! I’m not doing it. Two weeks? What kind of life is that?”

   “It’s the life of a caterpillar, that’s what.”

   “I’ve heard,” began Thom, looking around as if a bird had flown by, “that we can live longer than two weeks if we choose to…”

    Marty looked at his friend like he was crazy as a dung beetle.

   “Outta your mind, Thom…”

   “I’m serious, Marty!”

   “Thom, if Mama Jayce says we’re becoming pupae, that’s good enough for me. I mean, how would I know, cat? I’m only three days old! Mama’s been around for…”

   “For WEEKS, Marty! Weeks! I’ll bet she’s at LEAST three, maybe four weeks old! If she can do it...so can I!”

   At the next morning’s pre-day meeting, Mama Jayce reiterated yesterday’s motivation.

   “Remember, youngsters, a caterpillar must eat his full and then some while he can! You only have two weeks to grow and shed and grow and shed and grow until it’s time for the pupa stage!”

   A commotion began towards the back when one of the caterpillars called out, “How old are YOU?”

   Mother Jayce was caught off guard. “I - I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that, youngster. What did you ask?”

   A circle cleared around Thom, Marty and others disassociating themselves from the upstart.

   “With all due respect, Mother Jayce, how old are you? Are you two weeks old yet? Or are you older than that already?”

   She smiled at the impudent fuzzball. There was always one like this.

   “First of all, child, you need to understand that you NEVER ask a woman her age, all right? It’s very improper!” There were nervous chuckles across the terrain.

   “But I’ll tell you anyway, son. I’m twenty-two days old today. And to anticipate your next question, the fact that I didn’t go into the pupa stage with my eggmates is because there are always supposed to be a few of us who stay behind to…”

   “To convince the next generation to DIE on schedule?!?”

   Despite the shock of the caterpillar class, Mother Jayce remained unperturbed.

   “To teach your generation how to be the best caterpillars you can be. To prepare you for what’s to come.”

   “To prepare us to become PUPAE!”

   Smiling beatifically, she calmly responded. “Yes. To prepare you to become pupae.”

   Squinching towards her defiant pupil, she continued full voice so that all her students could hear her next sentence:

   “Thom, all of you, listen carefully, because this may be hard for you to understand. In order to gain your fullest life, you must be willing to give it up. If you can’t let go of this life, you will lose the chance at true life.”

   He thought about it for a minute.

   “That’s stupid.”

   Still smiling, she replied, “Sometimes the wisdom of the ages seems like foolishness to the newcomer. But you’ll see, dear Thom. You’ll learn.”

   Munching on yet another leaf, number seven for the day, Marty and Thom are almost unrecognizable from that confrontational day over a week ago. They have each shed two exoskeletons, a third will burst away for each before the sun rises again, and the time is approaching when Thom’s resolve will be tested.

   “So, where DID you go yesterday afternoon, Thom? You haven’t said a word.”

   “No, no, I guess I haven’t.”

   Silence, except for the sound of munching.

   “You gonna tell me, cat?”

   Silence. Munch, munch. Silence.

   “All right. Have it your…”

   “Have you ever seen the pupae, Marty?”

   Startled, Marty responded, “Ah, well, ah, no, no, I haven’t. Why?”

   Quietly, so as not to be overheard: “I have, Marty. That’s where I was. They aren’t alive,    Marty! Mama Jayce is full of bug juice. They’re just sacks where the dead caterpillars go! Marty, they’re just fattening us up!”

   “Why?”

   It was Thom’s turn to be startled.

   “Why?”

   “Why, Thom? You’re so sure about this conspiracy theory with the pupae - why would they be having us eat so much just to kill us in the pupae? There’s no logic to that.”

   “There’s no logic to just DYING, either, Marty!” Looking both ways (not like a bird search - that would be up, not side to side), he added surreptitiously, “When the morning comes, Marty? I’m going into hiding. If Mama Jayce can survive an extra seventeen days, I can too. I’m not giving up my life just on her word that something ‘better’ is on the other side!”

   Marty looked at his fuzzy friend with eyes that reflected both awe and pity. His audacity was exceeded only by his lack of faith.

   “Do what you gotta do, Thom. But let me ask you one thing.”

   “Shoot.”

   “Caterpillars have been here, in this spot, for a long time, haven’t we?”

   “Yeah, that’s what they’ve taught us. The egg patch is the same as it’s been for generations.”

   “Right. And so generations of caterpillars have accepted the pupae as the next step, haven’t they?”

   Grudgingly, Thom admitted as much.

   “Right. So… where ARE they?”

   “What?”

   “All those old pupae. Where ARE they? If the pupa is the end of our lifespan...shouldn’t there be lots of pupaed caterpillars hanging around? Where are they?”

   And for once Thom didn’t have an answer.

   The Day came.

   As Mother Jayce and some other mentors were helping Marty and the myriad of other two week old caterpillars create their sacks, Thom was nowhere to be found.

   Marty looked around wistfully, and Mother Jayce made note of it.

   “You’re looking for your friend Thom?”

   Nod.

   “Dear, he’ll come to the light sooner or later. We all do.”

   That caught Marty’s attention. “We?”

Smiling and nodding, Jayce squinched close. “We. I was a doubter, too. That’s the reason I stayed behind all those days ago. Half a lifetime for me. I didn’t know what was on the other side of these sacks.”

   “Mama?” Marty’s bristles brushed against hers. “What IS on the other side?”

   She looked at him with moisture in her eyes.

   “Something wonderful, dear. You’ll see soon enough.”

   Thom watched the tearful scene from a distance, too far away to ascertain what was being said. It didn’t matter. Marty was going to be dead by the end of the day. They all were. And yet, there they were building their own coffins, oblivious to the lies that were being told to them.

   “In order to gain your fullest life, you must be willing to lose your life.” Bah! “Let go of this life to give yourself the chance for your true life to begin!” Hah! Ridiculous! What kind of nonsense was that, anyway? That sounds like this life isn’t important! But it’s the only life we HAVE! How can it not be worth hanging on to with every fiber of your being?

   He went on his way, munching on more leaves to try and fill the gap in his heart.

   One day, twenty-two day old Thom was off on his own, having spurned the remainder of the caterpillar community and its lies. Suddenly, his preservation instincts kicked in, as something fluttered down towards him from above.

   “Aah! A bird! A bird! Don’t eat me!”

   “Thom, stop worrying! I’m not a bird!”

   The butterfly hovered there, just above him. He’d never seen one from this close before; it was beautiful. The colors were so spectacular! In fact, the colors looked - familiar.

   “Thom, do you recognize me?”

   Why should it know my name?

   “Ahhh…. I’ll admit, you look - vaguely familiar…”

   The butterfly landed on the ground next to Thom.

   “It’s me, Thom. Marty! Don't you recognize me?”

   And then there was a wave of emotion which overwhelmed Thom: amazement, awe, happiness, astonishment...and confusion.

   “Marty, how can this be? How could you have transformed so completely into - well, an entirely different species? It’s impossible!”

    The butterfly smiled, an odd expression on an insect which doesn’t ever frown, per se.    “No, it’s what Mama Jayce told me on the day I made my pupa. We were going to become something wonderful … and she was right.

   “That’s what pupae are, Thom! They’re the world’s greatest changing rooms! Inside those magical sacks, we are transformed into these glorious bodies. And you can do this, too, Thom!”

   “What?”

   “You can still become a butterfly if you want. Just do what Mama Jayce did - hang out with a batch of newbie caterpillars, teach them the ropes, and then when the time comes, make your pupae alongside theirs and wait!”

   “But… But… but I don’t know HOW to turn into a butterfly! Did I miss the instructions somewhere along the line? How did you do it, Marty?”

   “Thom, all you have to do is believe and obey. Understand that it’s a mystery that we can’t explain, but when you go into that pupa sack, somehow your body knows what to do. I mean, it knew how to shed those things exoskeletons, right? Do you know how to do it?”

   “Ah, well, Ah, no. No, I don’t.”

   “And that’s okay! Your body will do it for you. Trust the highest forces. Thom, stop doubting and just believe for once in your analytical life, cat! Just believe!”

   With that, the new butterfly goes soaring into the world, doing twirls and flips and just enjoying life to its fullest in a way that an earth bound caterpillar simply can’t. Thom watched with a bit of envy, and her words came to him:

    “In order to gain your fullest life, you must be willing to give it up. If you can’t let go of this life, you will lose the chance at true life.”

   I wasn’t willing to give up being a caterpillar in order to become a butterfly. I didn’t realize how much more there was in store for me if I only believed. I didn’t realize how my only roadblocks were inside of me.

   Thom stopped doubting that very minute, although the change of heart wasn’t enough by itself. It requires follow-through as well. He began squinching down towards the center of the plain, where he knew the younger caterpillars would be.

   Maybe his wisdom could be of use to them.