Saturday, December 3, 2016

God Is Just Like Any Other Dad! (Except, well...He's God.) - Chapter Eleven



11. You Were Always My Favorite

My favorite of the minor prophets has to be Malachi, whose book happens to be the very last book of the Old Testament, the last thing God says to His people before He shuts up for four centuries and then reappears big-time in Bethlehem.
The book of Malachi reads as a series of accusations, set-up questions, and follow-up examples from the Lord Himself. Quite often, we get to see the thought processes of the Israelites of history – the book of Jonah is written from Jonah’s perspective; Hosea from Hosea’s perspective, and so on.
Here, however, it’s the Lord Jehovah Himself Whose reactions are shown as best a human prophet can show them (Isaiah 55:8-9 not withstanding), and the groundwork is laid for the arrival of God in the flesh when next we hear from Him.
In Malachi’s writing, though, we see God not so much as the Father of the Hebrew Nation, but more like the stereotypical Jewish Mother….


“‘I have loved you,’ says the Lord. But you say, ‘How have You loved us?’ ‘Is not Esau Jacob’s brother?’ declares the Lord. ‘Yet I have loved Jacob, but Esau I have hated.’” (Malachi 1:2-3a)

          [Jewish Mom translation: “You were always my favorite, you know…”]

          “‘A son honors his father, and a servant his master. If then I am a Father, where is My honor? And if I am a master, where is My fear?’ says the Lord of hosts to you, ‘O priests, who despise My Name.’ But you say, ‘How have we despised Your Name?’ ‘By offering polluted food upon My altar.’ But you say, ‘How have we polluted You?’ ‘By saying that the Lord’s table may be despised.’” (1:6-7)

          [J-Mom: “But if you were really a good boy, you’d treat your mother better, with more respect! You bring me your dirty laundry and expect me to wash it for you, without even a thank you?”]

            “‘But you say, “What a weariness this is,” and you snort at it,’ says the Lord of hosts. ‘You bring what has been taken by violence or is lame or sick, and this you bring as your offering! Shall I accept that from your hand?’ says the Lord.” (1:13)

          [J-Mom: “You act like it’s such a burden to visit your Mother! Oh, you poor baby! It’s not like I labored sixteen hours to give you life or anything!”]

            “‘Behold, I will rebuke your offspring, and spread dung on your faces, the dung of your offerings, and you shall be taken away with it.’” (2:3)

          [J-Mom: “I ask to see my grandchildren; you never bring them around! It’s like I’m cowdung to you! My own grandchildren hardly know their own Nana!”]

“‘But you have turned aside from The Way. You have caused many to stumble by your instruction. You have corrupted the covenant of Levi’, says the Lord of hosts…” (2:8)

          [J-Mom: “What happened to everything I taught you?”]

          “‘And this second thing you do. You cover the Lord’s altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because He no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand.’ But you say, ‘Why does he not?’ ‘Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant.’” (2:13-14)

          [J-Mom: “And you wonder why I don’t send money anymore! You don’t write, you don’t call…And that hussy secretary of yours that steals all of your time now, instead of the dear Jewish girl you married out of high school! Don’t get me started on her!”]

            “You have wearied the Lord with your words. But you say, ‘How have we wearied Him?’ By saying, ‘Everyone who does evil is good in the sight of the Lord, and He delights in them.’ Or by asking, ‘Where is the God of justice?’” (2:17)

            [J-Mom: “And when you do call, all you do is whine at your poor elderly mother about the other creeps you work with!”]

            “‘Behold, I send My messenger, and He will prepare the way before Me. And the Lord whom you seek will suddenly come to His temple; and the messenger of the covenant in whom you delight, behold, He is coming,’ says the Lord of hosts. But who can endure the day of His coming, and who can stand when He appears? For He is like a refiner’s fire and like fullers’ soap.” (3:1-2)

            [J-Mom: “Someday, I’ll be gone from this earth, young man, and then you’ll be sorry!”]

“‘Will man rob God? Yet you are robbing Me’. But you say, ‘How have we robbed You?’ In your tithes and contributions.” (3:8)

            [J-Mom: “All those years, all that money I invested in your education, in your rabbinical training, and what have I gotten out of it? Zip! Zilch! Nada! Nothing!”]

“‘Your words have been hard against Me,’ says the Lord. But you say, ‘How have we spoken against You?’ You have said, ‘It is vain to serve God. What is the profit of our keeping His charge or of walking as in mourning before the Lord of hosts? (3:13-14)

            [J-Mom: “I’ve heard you talking behind your mother’s back, young man! Old Man Wallowitz, he overheard you insulting your poor mother, talking about how vain I am, and how demanding I am. No, no, Mister Holier-than-thou, I heard!”]
         
          Malachi 3 ends with a realization by the children of the Lord, those who have heard Malachi’s prophetic messages from God:

“Then those who feared the Lord spoke with one another. The Lord paid attention and heard them, and a book of remembrance was written before Him of those who feared the Lord and esteemed His Name. ‘They shall be mine,’ says the Lord of hosts, ‘in the day when I make up My treasured possession, and I will spare them as a man spares his son who serves him. Then once more you shall see the distinction between the righteous and the wicked, between one who serves God and one who does not serve Him.

And then, like a good mother who keeps her word and holds her grudges, the Lord went silent for the next four hundred years or so.

Until a pair of babies were born in Nazareth, babies who would change the game completely… Babies who would bravely speak to “the distinction between the righteous and the wicked” as grown men, men who would change the world the way a great running tandem can change the way American football is played and perceived.
The fullback, clearing the way? John The Baptist.
The ball carrier? Jesus Christ of Nazareth.


          Yet even Jesus had a mother.
          And moms are moms, no matter who the child is.
          Even when the child is Jesus Christ of Nazareth.
          And even when the mother is the Virgin Mary.

Look at John 2:1-5 (as with almost every quotation, this comes from the ESV):
1 On the third day there was a wedding at Cana in Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. 2 Jesus also was invited to the wedding with his disciples. 3 When the wine ran out, the mother of Jesus said to him, “They have no wine. 4 And Jesus said to her, “Woman, what does this have to do with me? My hour has not yet come.” 5 His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.

Now, picture what’s actually happening here – take the flowery language out, and forget for a moment that it’s JESUS CHRIST THE SON OF GOD and the legendary Virgin Mary speaking. It’s a Jewish mother and her twenty-something son (“My hour has not yet come” implies He has not yet begun His ministry, which like all Jewish men entering anything resembling the priesthood He will begin at age thirty.). They’re at a wedding, which by all appearances Mary is helping to organize. Jesus and his “bros” are just “hanging out” there, minding their own business, when the wine runs out. Big deal – these weddings lasted for days, and it was bound to run out sometime. But Mary knows something about her very special oldest Son (undoubtedly James and the other children were already alive and present as well, of course), and she intends to take advantage of His ‘gift’. Let’s ‘translate’ their conversation as Malachi was translated:

Mom:
“Son? Did you notice that they’re out of wine? Hint hint, hint hint?”
Son:
“Aw, Mom! I’m off the clock, and I’m just trying to ‘hang’, y’know?”
Mom (completely ignoring His protests):
“Servants, my Son Jesus will help you with the wine. Do whatever He tells you – even though it’ll sound a bit bizarre.”

One imagines that there’s an implicit “There’s a good boy”, maybe a cheek pinch along the way, and his disciples start giving Our Lord and Savior a hard time about being bossed around by Mommy… I’d imagine if Jesus happened to be in Nazareth around Passover time and broke bread at Mary’s home for the major feast, she’d make Him sit at the kid’s table again!

Family never changes, does it? And God never changes, either. He’ll always welcome you into His Home. And, like Mary, make sure that Jesus is always welcome in your home.


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